The Infinite Atonement by Tad R. Callister (Illustrated Edition) pg. 41. "Melvin J. Ballard, who was privileged for a brief moment to dream of being in [God's physical] presence, recounts: 'If I shall live to be a million years old, I shall never forget that smile. He [the Savior] took me into his arms and kissed me, pressed me to his bosom, and blessed me, until the narrow of my bones seemed to melt! . . . The feeling that I had in the presence of him who hath all things in his hands, to have his love, his affection, and his blessing was such that if I ever can receive that of which I had but a foretaste, I would give all that I am, all that I ever hope to be, to feel what I then felt!'"
I desire to feel that joy. To feel that Love. After reading things like that my heart can catch a glimps of that Love and it yearns for it. I think it is my spirit remembering and yearning. I do look forward to the day that I can be in the presence of my Savior and actually feel His love. It is worth the sacrifice, I need to remember that Love when I am feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. I am grateful that there are times when I can feel God's love in my life. When I feel Him watching over me or just reminding me that He is there.
One of those moments came tonight. I was re reading some of my journal entries and I came across one where Derek and I had been on a date soon after he had been called to be bishop. I was emotionally exhausted and he lifted me up. Told me that I was a great mom and to not be so hard on myself. I remember that time, I remember how he made me feel, I remember the Spirit telling me that what my husband was saying was true. The Spirit reminded me tonight that I again had been praying to know if I was doing a good job as a mother and I was reminded that I am. Those are sweet tender mercies of the Lord and ways that He lets me know I am loved. I am grateful for a Father in Heaven who loves me and cares for me even when I am having a hard day. What a blessing to be so loved and to feel that love.
I desire to feel that joy. To feel that Love. After reading things like that my heart can catch a glimps of that Love and it yearns for it. I think it is my spirit remembering and yearning. I do look forward to the day that I can be in the presence of my Savior and actually feel His love. It is worth the sacrifice, I need to remember that Love when I am feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. I am grateful that there are times when I can feel God's love in my life. When I feel Him watching over me or just reminding me that He is there.
One of those moments came tonight. I was re reading some of my journal entries and I came across one where Derek and I had been on a date soon after he had been called to be bishop. I was emotionally exhausted and he lifted me up. Told me that I was a great mom and to not be so hard on myself. I remember that time, I remember how he made me feel, I remember the Spirit telling me that what my husband was saying was true. The Spirit reminded me tonight that I again had been praying to know if I was doing a good job as a mother and I was reminded that I am. Those are sweet tender mercies of the Lord and ways that He lets me know I am loved. I am grateful for a Father in Heaven who loves me and cares for me even when I am having a hard day. What a blessing to be so loved and to feel that love.
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